Hokino and I have now been dating for an entire year, which (fun fact) is the longest I’ve ever dated anyone. But without getting sappy, the reason I’m telling you this is because I wanted to share something I have learned from dating Hoki that has played a large role in why, despite having a lot to stress about lately, life has still been pretty great. So I’m going to start this blog post off with a story:

 

When Hoki and I first started dating, I was absolutely flabbergasted that he could spend an entire weekend in bed, either watching TV, playing video games, or reading. My “must always be working or you’ll never accomplish anything” mindset had the hardest time understanding how he could do this without going stir crazy. He, on the other hand probably thought I was mental for not being able to sit down for more than two hours to watch a show on a Saturday afternoon. I distinctly remember one weekend where, on Friday night, we stayed up late watching the Umbrella Academy (which is admittedly a very good show). The next morning, we continued watching literally all day without getting up except to eat a quick lunch.

 

 

By the time 5 o’clock rolled around, I was SO antsy. The only thing my mind could focus on was the need to get out and go for a run to make up for being so lazy. Hoki, on the other hand, couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to just finish the show, since we were only a couple episodes from the end. When I emphatically told him we had wasted the entire weekend, he replied, “but being lazy all weekend is so nice!” I’m pretty sure I stared at him like he’d lost his mind.

 

Needless to say, I went for a run.

 

We ended up having this conversation pretty frequently when Hoki and I were first dating, but the more we talked about it, the more I began to realize something: I had completely forgotten how to relax. And I began to realize that perhaps that was why I felt so stressed all the time. And so I decided to try doing it Hoki’s way…

 

Well, at least a little. Our compromise is to now do a little yard work or house cleaning on a Saturday morning before taking a nap and watching a show all afternoon (because I will go crazy if I don’t accomplish anything all day).

 

 

Hokino has been good for me in many ways, in particular helping me slow down and smell the roses every once in a while. I am very much a member of the “Type A” personality group, and so I want things done a certain way. I will keep working until I either figure it out or have a complete breakdown. I follow rules even if the rules don’t necessarily make sense. And while these can be good in certain situations, I’ve started to realize that being so tight-laced has in many instances prevented me from enjoying life as much as I could.

 

So while I looked at naps as a waste of time, for Hoki, it was the perfect way to recharge so he could start the next week fresh and ready to dive into the work. Spending the evenings watching New Girl together at first made me anxious because of all the projects I wasn’t working on. But I began to see it as the perfect break that let me get back to my projects the next day with fresh eyes. 

 

But I guess the real reason for me writing this post is two-fold: first, don’t be scared to try new ways of doing things. You may find that changing your routines are the very thing that help you become even more productive, successful, or happy. And second, if you’re anything like me, take the time to slow down. I promise you, not only will you enjoy life more… you might also get more things done because you’ll find you’re no longer running on just steam.